WM - 26.9 - Philosophy 101

[on_holy_ground]

The Self is the friend of a man who masters himself through the self. But for the man without self-mastery, the self is like an enemy at war." - Bhagavad Gita, India (circa 1st Century A.D.)

A man’s worst enemy is all to often the image that looks back from the mirror. It is something that man has known for centuries, and yet that has not stopped the blame for hardships and problems from being placed on the shoulders of another. If something goes wrong in a man’s life, he is always quick to point the finger at anyone and anything that he can, so as to make himself believe that it could not possibly be his own fault. Worse still is when society itself offers man excuses, rather than making him take responsibility for his actions.

If a project that needed to be done by a certain time is not completed on schedule, then it was due to family issues and not procrastination. If money is not there for the bills at the months end, then it is due to not getting paid enough and not because money was spent on items that were wanted but not needed. If a person does violence to another, then it is due to a bad childhood or video games, and not because they have no desire to control their actions. If something is wrong with the country a person lives in, then it is because the country’s leader is incapable, not because someone did not vote when given the opportunity because they did not think it would matter.

Self-control and self-discipline are things that everyone can learn. Those that lack such abilities can find techniques to help build these skills, and thus make life less stressful. To take responsibility for what we do, and to learn to control the habits that would cause us grief, can be difficult for everyone. It is never easy for someone to look to himself for the things that go wrong in his life, and to make the changes that need to be made to make things go smoother. However, the rewards that come with learning and using these skills are well worth the time and difficulty it might take to master them.

To learn to control oneself is the first step in having a happy life, and in making the lives of those around you happier as well.

Comments

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Are you talking about me? It sounds like you're talking about me.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

I am not speaking of anyone in particular. I am simply making an observation.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

It's an observation about self-control! Didn't we just talk about how I have no self-control!?



ooc: I am soooo sorry. There's a method to the madness, I promise. And despite what I said yesterday, she couldn't let it pass. My apologies.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

We talked about how we both need to learn to compromise.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

And about how I have no patience! And no self-control! And I cried again because I always cry because I have NO SELF-CONTROL!

And now I'm capslocking. See? No self-control!

And you're passive-aggressively going on about how people with no self-control can't have a happy life and how I make you miserable!

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

You are reading things into this that simply are not there. I had a topic to write about, and I wrote about it. If we had not talked, my topic would have been exactly the same.

It has absolutely nothing to do with our conversation.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

You think I need to control myself. Deny that.

[locked]

I went to the gynecologist today. Can I tell you about it or will it make you uncomfortable?

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

I think that you will need to have patience with me over the coming weeks, which is exactly what I spoke with you about. That is something that I cannot deny.

[locked]

Of course you can tell me. You can tell me anything.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Weeks?

[locked]

I went for a pap smear, because I missed last year's when I was in Mexico, and I really need to stay on top of that. Anyway, I was lucky to get an appointment, because I didn't schedule one months in advance the way I usually have to. And as it was, I didn't see my usual doctor, I saw this other doctor. I think she was new and it was sort of interesting. She was all careful about taking my history and asking me about a lot of things that nobody has ever asked me about. She looked at my scars. And touched them. It was weird.

Anyway, the upshot is is that she thinks I should have fertility testing. Just to be sure. Because I've been making a lot of assumptions that might not be true.

And I have to go back to the neurologist next week. I'm spending as much time at the doctor as my father is.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

Possibly, yes.

[locked]

Did you like her, or is it one of those things were it is too soon to tell?

It is always good to get additional opinions on such things, just to be absolutely sure.

I'm glad that you are keeping up with that while you are home. I probably worry too much, but I cannot seem to help that these days.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Not years?

[locked]

I did like her. She said she'd give me a referral to a specialist, but I told her I was going back to Rome. And she said she'd see if she could find out anything about any doctors there. But I really did like her. I wouldn't mind having her be my doctor at all.

You think so? I didn't know how you'd react. I really want to have a child, Darius. You have no idea.

March is Traumatic Brain Injury month. Did you know that? I was reading something online and now I have some questions I need to ask him.

What are you worried about?

Haha, that's all very fragmented. Are you sure your post wasn't about me?

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

*soft smile* I seriously doubt it will take that long.

[locked]

No, I can't say that I have any idea how much you want a child, but I would like for you to be able to do so if it is at all possible. I think you would be a very good mother.

I didn't know that, actually. I hope he has the answers that you are looking for.

You.

I am quite sure. It wasn't until you said something that I realized that you might think it would be about what we had discussed, and for that I apologize.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Okay. I don't have as many years to play with as you do.

[locked]

I wasn't sure how you'd feel about it. I mean, I shouldn't get my hopes up, but I can't help it. I can't. I want a baby, Darius.

Don't worry about me, though. I'm tougher than I look.

Okay. I'm sorry I overreacted. I'm very tense these days.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

I know, and I am trying my best to get through this as quickly as I can, I promise.

[locked]

Wanting a child is perfectly natural, and I think that if there is a chance that you can do so, then you should take that chance.

I know that you are, but I worry just the same. It is one of those things that I have trouble controlling.

That is understandbable given what happened to your father, along with our own situation.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

I know. I'll be more patient soon, I promise.

[locked]

It wouldn't bother you that it wouldn't be yours? I mean, I'm assuming you'd be in the picture and maybe that's premature, maybe you won't want to be, wouldn't want to raise a child. Maybe this is all premature. This is all premature.

So you were talking about your own self control? I didn't think about that.

My father, and us, and maybe my head, too. Some of the things I've been reading about traumatic brain injury make me sort of wonder whether my mood swings are part of that. I never thought about that until just now. Do you think I'm moodier than I used to be? Like back before I came to Rome to stay with you at first?

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

I know. I have faith in you, and in us.

[locked]

I came to terms a long time ago with my own inability to have children, and I would not take the chance away from someone else to have one of their own. Of course, I would be honored to be a part of the life of your child, regardless of the possible prematurity of the idea.

I have issues with it at times, just as all people do. It is simply part of being human.

I think that you have been quicker to worry and fret about things that you might not have noticed before, if that makes any sense.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

I'm glad. It isn't always easy for me, but I try to have faith, too.

[locked]

I probably shouldn't even talk about it. It will jinx it.

I didn't know that. I mean, I knew there were things that upset me, but I thought it was because of what happened with Ray.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

Faith is never easy, but it is always worth the trouble.

[locked]

I don't believe in such things, and I for one am glad that you felt you could tell me.

I had not thought to connect it to your head injury either, I'm afraid. Things have been so difficult to judge as of late.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

I miss you.

[locked]

I completely believe in bad luck and jinxes. Completely.

What if I'm always like this? What if the head injury makes me impossible to live with?

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

I miss you as well.

[locked]

Have you ever considered the possibility that it is precisely because you believe in such things that they come to pass for you?

You are not impossible to live with, and if that were the case then we would simply learn to adjust to the changes.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

[locked]

It makes me feel bad when you say things like that to me. I'm not stupid, Darius.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

[locked]

My apologies. I did not intend to make you feel that way.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

[locked]

I didn't think you did.

Sometimes it scares me to see just how different we are.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

[locked]

They do say that opposites attract.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

[locked]

Yes they do.