TM - 65 - What in your life are you most dissatisfied with and why?

[on_holy_ground]

Darius was generally at peace with the many aspects of his life, and didn’t tend to dwell on the things that he couldn’t do anything about, such as his distant past. He led a simple existence, but one that had become very fulfilling to him over the years. There were many opportunities every day to help people with their problems and to give them a sense of peace and faith, and most days he wouldn’t change anything about his life as it was in this moment.

However, there were times that Darius wondered about the wisdom of his choice to become a Catholic priest, times such as the day that Xavier St. Cloud had come to St. Julien’s and confessed to the recent murder of six people. Xavier had known that Darius would not break the rules surrounding confession, and so he had told him of what he had done and what he would do again, delighting in torturing the priest with the knowledge that he could do nothing to stop him.

Darius had wanted to help the inspector that had come to see him regarding the robbery. He had wanted to be able to do more in order to possibly save the lives of innocent people, and yet he would not break the rules regarding confession in order to do so. Darius knew that the rules that surrounded the priesthood were in place for good reasons, that it gave people the peace of mind to be able to tell him anything, and know that it would go no farther than him.

The inspector had said that the consequences of Darius’ choice would be on his head, and while a part of him knew that wasn’t true, a part of him had taken that statement to heart. It wasn’t the first time that such a thing had happened, and he knew that it most likely wouldn’t be the last, and it was that aspect of his life that bothered him more than anything. Those occasional feelings of helplessness due to the choice he had made in becoming a priest.

Comments

[aricamuse.livejournal.com]

It must be quite a burden to listen to others problems and see the solution that you can't pursue.

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

It can be quite difficult at times, yes.

[andre-korda.livejournal.com]

Darius, you have made a choice and you have stuck with it. In the end, the good you have done, through your hand, far outweighs the moments in which your hand does not control. Reflection on those times may be difficult and disheartening, but it also helps to better understand why you chose the path you did.


ooc: It was a very nice post, well done!

[on-holy-ground.livejournal.com]

My mind tells me the same thing, it is just my heart that doesn't always agree. Xavier was also a special situation given my past with him prior to this occasion. I know however in my soul that my choice to be what I am has been for the greater good.